Lifestyle The more you know

I feel alone: a passing phase or a sentence for life?

I feel lonely. If you happened here doing this research on the web, know that you are not alone.

It is not a play on words. The phrase you typed is one of the most searched “keywords” on Google.

I also feel lonely, it is much sought after, but a little less.

Men probably feel a little less lonely than women, or they do not realize they are alone and then they are unable to take action to find a solution or, unlike women, they do not trust external help and prefer to suffer instead ask for help, even in the anonymity of the web.

So there are many women – and men – who feel alone and do not know where to beat their heads.

Why do you feel lonely? Because in fact, we live in an era of solitude and isolation.

Contemporary life involves and engages in many aspects that have nothing to do with the search for and improvement of an authentic connection with others.

We are often too busy in concrete activities that are supposed to be really important, so much so that we forget the relationship with others, considered “in a nutshell”, less concrete and less important.

So we remain alone and leave others alone. One is indifferent to one’s solitude as to that of others.

You also feel lonely because you have more ambitions from an emotional point of view and happiness and serenity are objectives that everyone nowadays somehow sets themselves.

“I felt lonely and peaceful at the same time. I think it’s a very rare kind of happiness.”

Stephen King

At other latitudes and at other times they do not exist and they had many demands from this point of view. It was and is more urgent to think about how to put together lunch with dinner or at least one meal a day, if possible.

Let’s say that loneliness and isolation are more easily felt in so-called advanced societies.

Because they are the least inclined to share and connect, in the face of the web, and those that urge greater satisfaction in the round.

A paradox, in fact.

You can feel lonely because you are going through a difficult period. It can be a separation, a mourning, a professional difficulty. A critical moment for health. A long period without a partner.

Or maybe it’s about long-standing misunderstandings with the family of origin, which resurface stronger from time to time.

Or even a succession in one’s life of those who consider themselves failures.

You can feel lonely when you are a couple, a family, with your children or in the midst of the beginning of a relationship that does not mesh.

When you don’t understand what he wants and does and what his intentions are.

He feels lonely because he doesn’t feel loved and understood.

And this, again, happens to many, at any age, to men and women.

Often he feels lonely because we have not felt loved and understood from an early age and therefore when we grow up it becomes more difficult to face moments of uncertainty and emotional fragility.

He also feels lonely because we do not accept life’s difficulties, his defeats, frustrations.

We do not accept the end of love, the end of a professional relationship or the fact that that guy just doesn’t consider us.

And then anger, a sense of defeat and a sense of helplessness make one feel alone.

When we feel alone, we feel we have no way out and we think that our life will always be like this. Without love and with so much fear. Until the end.

I feel alone: accepting a situation to transform it

I imagine that if you came here because of despair, at this point you feel a little annoyed by my reasoning.

I understand that at this moment you need understanding and encouragement and not someone who preaches to you.

You are right. If you have read this far, you have undoubtedly been good at resisting and for sure you are already pulling out the right energies to get out of the moment of crisis.

Since curiosity has kept you here and curiosity is certainly curiosity for the discovery of a possible solution.

A warning is a must. Feeling alone is a very human and very common phenomenon, which does not resolve itself once and for all.

Occasionally and sometimes for apparently inexplicable reasons, it happens and it will still happen that you feel alone.

When you have these feelings of isolation, little love, almost desperation, the first and most important step is to recognize them for what they are and accept them.

Then it is good to identify the deep root of these sensations, asking a question like: “Ok, I feel alone. What is the real reason? “

Do you feel lonely because a story does not mesh? Why did you break up with your partner? Why haven’t anyone seen decent people on the horizon for years? OK well. These are valid reasons.

And it is good to accept reality for what it is. If you do not accept that your story does not mesh, that you are leaving with your partner and that you have not seen anyone on the horizon for years, it becomes really complicated to trigger the transformation process.

Because not resigning to what happens in reality, makes us stand still where we are, that is, what is wrong.

It makes people become plaintive, sour, who show their frustrations to others and are not nice.

To stand still, to look back, to complain and not to accept what happens or has happened does not allow to invest resources in changing the situation.

On the contrary, it leads to always the same and repetitive attitudes, which always lead to the same and repetitive results.

I feel lonely. One more step to strengthen.

Accepting situations that cannot be changed and that do not depend on us should not be considered a loss and renouncing attitude.

If not, faced with this consideration, one would feel even more alone.

Because frustration plays an important part in the feeling of being alone and not loved by anyone.

Accepting the painful situations for which little or nothing we can do is an adult and mature and above all winning attitude since it allows you to turn the page and dedicate yourself to something else, with a renewed spirit.

When I am depressed I feel lonely, it is important to reflect on ourselves and on the reasons we find in opposition to what is happening.

Do you feel alone for the end of a story? Whether you like it or not, the end of the story must be accepted, also because it involves another person over whom you not only have power and control but also power and control.

Can’t you accept the end of this story or the fact that a man doesn’t consider you? In fact, it is not an attitude that is useful to you, that makes you feel good.

What makes you not accept this situation? Wounded pride? The belief that you can no longer fulfill your sentimental happiness? The idea of ​​being made fun of?

Find the real motivation and above all look for its antidote, that is, a valid push, an important reason to go further.

If you do not accept the end of a story out of pride, hurt, you can think that it is an important feeling, of course, but that it must not condition your present and your future.

It is an obstacle to your serenity and therefore in addition to being accepted, at first, it must subsequently be overcome and abandoned.

To address other desires, new projects, and more satisfying objectives.

If you feel alone, stop to reflect on the inner motivations that make you feel how you feel.

And trust a positive transformation for you, which depends on you and your choices.

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